News from Pen ar Bed

Today I received news from New Zealand. Aidan sent me an email in answer to the one I sent him, saying hello and giving pictures. I knew he wouldn't write back soon. I didn't think he'd write back this quickly.

I was in tears after reading it, still am. But they're tears of happiness, as I'm now a friend of his. If you read on, you may not understand everything, but you may see the reason for my happiness. So here goes...



"Whats the difference between a duck?

An old joke that I've been telling since I was a kid - the point being that there is no answer.
It lives in the realm of "im not here for your entertainment - you're here for mine"

Anyway I thought I would reply, a month or two late, sure - but make no mistake. There is heartfelt effort here. (or possibly indigestion) The short time since you left has seen 'alot go on' as the song says... but true to form. Nothing really happens.

Paula comes back in just over a month now and as you needn't guess; yes - i am VERY excited by her return. But i have to constantly remind myself, that - like pretty much everything - this is the easy part. There's no choice in our current situation so there's no big calls to make (save for the ones to NYC), and no tough decisions to pull. It's when she arrives back on the 9th of August that things really get interesting. We may love each other - of that much im sure, but can we fall back 'in love' with each other? - Who knows? Effort and a bit of alcoholised dancing may help but nothing is certain.

What is certain though is that i've missed you.

Physical contact has always been big on my list. Im a hugger - and so your departure has left me somewhat in the same place i was last year. But also I have lost two much more important things. A place to doss in the city when im drunk. (doss = crash or sleep) And a friend who, having nothing between us (ha! get the pun?) allowed me to be really open and talky and just let loose. I owe you for that - its rare, and nice.

I got your note. You have impeccable timing and a gift for romantic style that would be hard found outside of the meaninglessness of choreographed pop-cinema. Yet its real, and you are real and that authenticity in the face of such bullshit that we live thought gives you extra credit. Do not question yourself up or down, merely sideways. This may not make sense now, and if so i doubt it ever will - it is just more of the amazing shit stream that is life. It is your job to enjoy it.

You are a wonderful person and I am only thankful for our passing paths. Feel free to write back, however this email finds you. I may not write back straight away, I may not write for months or years - but i will remember you, until I forget.

And then i will open up my email and say "howdy" back.


Transatlanticly yours,
Aidan "


Honestly, no-one has ever been as nice to me as he has been. I'll cherish this friendship for a while longer, if you don't mind...